Taking six days off of work has got me all screwed up, and not just my “schedule”, though that’s whacked all to hell right now also (case in point: I should be sleeping right now!). Monday – the first (official) day back – was fine. I had actually gone in for a few hours Saturday and Sunday, so I was mostly caught up on email and ready to get something done. I actually got up when the alarm went off – despite having only slept five hours – and was all about getting to work. That lasted one day.
Today sucked. My interest in the work to be done is practically non-existent. A review late yesterday of what’s coming up in the next few months lowered my motivation level even more. The entire dynamic within my group had changed a couple of months back, and that’s not helping either. Top it off with my usual “anniversary-depression” – I’ve been there six years as of tomorrow, the 25th. Add it all up and the summer is looking pretty bad.
I’ll try to latch on to my belief that this is all really just the usual anniversary-related crap, and it’s really no worse than years gone by, so there’s nothing to get all worried about. Still, though…I spend too much of my life focused on work – despite wanting and planning to do other things – to be content with the drudgery that makes up 90% of my job.